The Atlantic has an article about how President-elect Trump is so dumb that he’s already moved the Doomsday Clock up a minute. They didn’t phrase it quite like that, but I’m just trying to save everyone a little time here.

Today’s DWP comes from The Snorkeler, who thinks there’s a good chance that this is all part of some master plan Trump has cooked up. Spoiler: It isn’t.


“So,” Saraphina drummed her well-manicured nails on the surface of her compressed hardwood desk. “Last time you let him back in he took your car and you haven’t seen it since. The time before that he told your 17 year old daughter that she, and this is a quote from the incident report, ‘had an ass worth memorializing’. And it looks like you won’t be able to qualify for a line of credit until you’ve paid off the debts he accumulated over the past eight years he’s been mooching off you.” The client looked at her with steely eyes.

“He’s a good man though, you just have to know him like I do.”

Saraphina could feel a tiny little piece of her soul die and a vein in her neck throb. “Nope. That’s not true.”

The client stood up, uttered what sounded like a curse under her breath and huffed out of Saraphina’s office, throwing the door open before slamming it shut. In the two seconds between when the door was opened and closed again Saraphina saw a waiting room filled with clients. She put her head in her hands.

What good was any of it? People came in once a year for their mandated “good advice counseling session” and listened through gritted teeth to officials like Saraphina who told them the painfully, stupidly obvious until they couldn’t take it anymore and stormed out. She could have told Health & Human Services what a waste of tax-payer time and money this was, but like her clients, they just wouldn’t listen.


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